Smart Lemming Diary: Poaching as a Recruitment Tactic is Complicated

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Does poaching as a recruitment tactic create difficult situations?

Is an innocent call from a former boss, really an innocent reconnection, when you’re in the process of poaching from a precious employer?

How do we get over anger at a former boss? Why does understanding and forgiveness matter?

Below is my journal entry from a key time when I was a VP of Sale Operations and Marketing, facing these business situations.

July 23, 2006

My CEO returned from vacation this week. Of course, he had the Controller, CTO, and I on an important deliverable for the initial information request for the potential letter of intent process that we may go into with one of our primary channels. I also had four Management Team meetings on the same day.

During the second meeting, I received a call on my cell phone, but let it roll to voice mail. I checked to see who it was. I was shocked, but not shocked to see it was my former boss. I interrupted my Executive team meeting by saying, “That was my old boss; they just left me a voice mail.”

My CEO, who’s aware that my former company most likely will be annoyed that we’re poaching from them, said,

“Wow, I can’t wait to hear what they has to say!” I just looked at the Controller, who gave me a look that conveyed, “Be cautious.”

The Outreach

I checked the message. They sounded nervous during their initial hello, and then sounded relaxed as if nothing had happened. It was weird, like it was October 2004 again. Basically, they left me the following message:

“Hi Lori. It’s me, it’s Friday afternoon. While I know it’s Friday noon, I’m in the airport on my way back home, I’ve been gone all week. And I was talking with your former colleagues, of course, a couple of weeks ago. I guess it’s been longer than that now, and through them, have heard of all of your wonderful successes at your company. And through your Marketing Manager, I’ve head of the wonderful successes that you and your partner had with your sale to MTV. I wanted to congratulate you on all those things.

I will be in the office all next week and then travel again the following week. And if you get a chance, would love to chat with you and catch up. And find out how you’re doing! My phone number is still the same. My office extension is the same.”

What are the intentions?

I had to wrap my head around this. In the back of my mind, I knew that my old boss would be the first one to call between us. It’s not their style to be reactive. The Controller and I walked to get lunch after our meeting, while I’m telling him about the voice mail.

“This is really affecting you,” he said. I replied, “It’s complicated. I think it could be more than a ‘Hi, how’ve you been’ call. I think they know something’s up, that we’ve recruited their worker. I can’t call my old boss back for some time. I have to confirm that my former colleague is still coming on board with us, which could be a huge hit for my former employer. Also, their top sales person wants an offer from us. I don’t want to be taken off guard by my old boss, as they change the catch-up discussion to a sudden question, asking me about our poaching.” The Controller agreed.

My New Director of Channel?

Right after that, I called my new candidate and gave her a status update. By saying,

“We don’t know any more today than we did the last time I called you. We may go into a letter-of-intent process, maybe not. All we know is that everyone loves us. It’s only a matter of time. Someone may buy us.”

“I’ve been thinking about it, talked with my family. We’ve all agreed that I can’t pass this opportunity up. I’d like to move my start date back by one week, so I can give three weeks notice. I’m calling my CEO now.” She replied with excitement in her voice.

But the tone changed in her voice,

“My CEO’s been acting funny. The day I left a message for him, when I was going to give notice before you called, he never returned my call. Then he was traveling on Monday and by Tuesday, he was all over me, in my office, always stopping by, asking how I was, and telling me about the upcoming things that were going to happen and how it was good for me. I think he knows.”

“That makes sense. My old boss just left me a voice mail wanting to catch up, saying they had talked to your coworker, who turned me down and heard about all my successes. My former boss and CEO don’t do anything without cause. Be on guard when you talk with your CEO.” I told her. “Thanks for telling me about your old boss. I agree with you. I think they both know,” my former colleague said.

Self-awareness: I wouldn’t be where I am today

Even if my old boss didn’t have ulterior motives, I can’t call them right now. In fact, I can’t call until the dust has settled. Like I said earlier, their top sales person wants us to offer them any job. My old boss will not like that I’ve tried to steal her top sales person too.

At least this situation has forced me to reflect on why I was so hurt and angry after my last job was eliminated. I understand my former boss’s business reasons for letting me go. I would have let me, if I were in their shoes. In fact, I wouldn’t be where I am today if they hadn’t. I wouldn’t have built the new site for my partner and our startup right after my exit, and then we wouldn’t have had that site to use as a sales tool, which helped us get acquired.

My former sales colleague wouldn’t have called me about the Director of Marketing job in my current CEO’s company, if I had still been working with my old employer. And I wouldn’t be VP. There is a reason for everything. I’m very grateful how things unfolded. As a bonus, I’m no longer angry or hurt either.

Bad Timing, No Window of Time

I don’t feel toxic anymore like I did when my former boss let me go in April 2005. However, as much as I’d like to return the call, I can’t. Not for some time. I think that would be best. I just hope that I don’t miss the window to reconnect.

My old boss may and should be ticked off at me for poaching their employees. The window could close on reconnecting, especially if we negotiate a good compensation plan for the sales person, securing her as a hire. I’ll just have to wait and see. But at least, I’m not angry and bitter anymore. I don’t want to be that toxic employee who can’t get over things.

Thoughts on being poached

As you can see, poaching as a recruitment tactic creates complications for the person doing the poaching and the one being poached. There’s a level of secrecy that makes everyone uncomfortable, especially the person being poached.

If you’re being poached, the best thing to do is be honest with your employer, telling them why you’re flattered and if you’re interested in the offer. Who knows, maybe they’ll make a counter offer to keep you. If they don’t, then you have permission to move forward, guilt free.

Thoughts on being the poacher

Is an innocent call from a former boss, really an innocent call when you’re poaching from their company? No, but maybe yes. Unless you’re psychic, then you won’t know if that outreach from your former boss is an attempted to just reconnect with you to mend fences.

However, if you’re poaching, then you’re duty is to your current company, so you must protect your recruiting efforts by staying in stealth mode rather than move forward on the reconnection. What’s the harm? If you haven’t heard from the person for awhile, then a few days or weeks won’t hurt. Be reflective and not reactive. You’ll find your own answer that’s right for you.

Why forgiveness matters

How do we get over anger at a former boss? Why does understanding and forgiveness matter? During the course of our career, we all experience hurt and anger at some point. If the goal is to enjoy the journey, then hurt and anger is baggage that keeps you from enjoying the ride.

I’ve learned that it’s best to understand why you’re hurt and angry by putting yourself in the other person’s shoes. If you see things from their perspective, then that might help the forgiveness process.

Why does understanding and forgiveness matter? So we’re not toxic workers, who prospective employers won’t hire. These issues may come out in your new gig in an irrational way. Being a toxic worker only you make you unpleasant to work with. So, get over your issues, let go of the past, forgive and don’t forget, and start enjoying work.

The Smart Lemming Diary is a series that chronicles a journey of laid-off worker, who becomes a Vice President of Sales Operations & Marketing for a small entrepreneurial healthcare technology company. For previous entries in this series, click here. For the first diary entry, click here. For the highlighted Smart Lemming Diary entries, click here.

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