Smart Lemming Diary: Poaching Former Colleagues and Dealing with Unresolved Anger with a Former Boss
Why do new executives bring in their own team when they start at a new company? How do they recruit their former colleagues or direct reports?
Is it easy to get over the hurt and anger of being severed from one of your favorite employers? Does time heal those old wounds of betrayal?
Below is my journal entry from a key time when I was a VP of Sale Operations and Marketing facing these situations and issues.
June 30, 2006
Poaching as a Recruiting Tactic
A few weeks ago, I called a former coworker about a position in my department. She had heard that I had flipped our startup and was doing well. I told her about my Channel Sales position, saying that she was perfect for it. I emphasized that I would even tailor some of the job specifically for her strengths.
She couldn’t turn down my offer to fast track her into our company. We scheduled a quick series of meetings with our Executive team members and one of our senior Sales members. Everyone loved her. The Controller and I came up with a comp plan and the CEO extended the offer.
You said what to my former boss for me?
My former colleague had a business trip that would delay her answer to us. In fact, she was traveling with my former boss, who eliminated my job at their company on April 23, 2005.
After a long trip with my former boss and several meetings later, she declined our offer.
“I’ll probably regret this, but I still have more I can do here. Thank you for the generous comp plan. I realized it wasn’t just about the money. I told her about your offer. We talked with probably five hours total during the trip.” I replied, “You told her that you had a job offer?” She replied, “In fact, I told her what you told me that you might be interested in talking with her after all this time.”
Stunned, I just listened as she went onto to say,
“Your former boss was happy to hear that as she said ‘I’ve wanted to call Lori, but didn’t know how to start that dialogue.’”
Old Issues, Same Anger
First, I was upset that my former colleague said this to my old boss. When I mentioned it to her, I was taking the high road, but that certainly didn’t mean I have forgiven my old boss for letting me go, without personally telling me first. I just listened to her, and then wrapped up the call. After the call, I didn’t realize that I had any anger in me let alone the same anger.
Why the sudden anger? I was loyal to my old boss. I made her look great with my work, which she always contributed to me. I had made some missteps, but she always told me I was harder on myself then she could ever be. My boss was loyal back. I got into a serious personal crisis that she managed from ground zero for me and contained the situation. That’s how we protected each other.
But things change. Jobs change. Work relationships get strained.
It was clear my skills were evolving and my old company couldn’t accommodate my professional needs. Soon I wasn’t a fit anymore and I was let go. I was angry because my former boss didn’t tell me personally. She had her new director that I reported into tell me with her on the call. Long story short, I expected her to tell me, not the new guy.
Words of Wisdom
Fast forward to today. My old boss is signaling that she’d like to talk with me, because she thinks I’d like to talk with her. I processed this issue with one of my coaches, who told me,
“I think your old boss was trying to support her director in the chain of command and didn’t think it was appropriate for her to tell you directly. I know that my former VP wouldn’t have done that. Think about it. Maybe she wanted to tell you, but couldn’t because she believes in the chain of command.”
I hadn’t thought about it from that perspective. It made sense and seemed to diminish some of anger. My coach continued,
“Your industry is too small. You’re following her career path. You both are peers now at the executive level. You could learn so much from her. You could use her in your network. Don’t let your anger hold you back. You should call her first, make the first move.”
It made sense. I replied,
“You’re right. I find it ironic that my career is vaguely mimicking hers. I’ve always admired the things she’s done. While I would have approached her situations differently, I understand her motives and actions.”
I will, but not right now. I’m grateful that my former colleague did talk with my old boss about me.
Another Former Colleague Calls Me
After the first former colleague declined our offer, another former colleague called me, asking me if she was qualified for the position. I went into orbit! There could only be one other person at my former company that was equal to my primary target and it was her.
I fast tracked her into meetings by getting her in on Monday, then making the offer on Wednesday, and negotiating and finalizing her acceptance on Thursday.
I received her signed offer letter last night as I was packing for vacation. I’ve hired her in as a Senior Director, who’ll manage our Channels. While she’ll do front-line work, she’ll eventually manage the group of Sales Engineers that we’ll need for channel. This former colleague will be giving notice soon, so I can’t really call my old boss until then. Meanwhile, my CEO and I are having secret meetings with another one of my former Sales people. This person is excited to work with me again. I’m recruiting her for our sales team.
Food for Thought
Upper managers bring in their own team or former colleagues when they start a new job because they can produce results with proven talent. They’ve worked with these people in the trenches and know they can achieve results. These people bring in their own tools and templates, repeatable processes, and have shared experiences with the upper manager.
For example, when my CEO brought me, all he had to do was just add water, and then his Marketing department was created. I had my own repeatable processes down pat on how to do this. Then I recruited my Marketing Manager, who was the lead in creating our Sales Operations. We delivered results in the blink of an eye.
As for my anger with my old boss? I learned a valuable lesson. To put myself in her shoes. I was so hurt and angry that I never stopped to reflect on the possibility that she may have been following the chain of command.
The Smart Lemming Diary is a series that chronicles a journey of laid-off worker, who becomes a Vice President of Sales Operations & Marketing for a small entrepreneurial healthcare technology company. For previous entries in this series, click here. For the first diary entry, click here. For the highlighted Smart Lemming Diary entries, click here.
